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Readers Respond: What Is Your Opinion of Grandmother Showers?

Responses: 16


Those who like them enjoy celebrating life passages with their friends. Those who dislike them label them as gift-grabs. What is your opinion of showers for grandmothers-to-be? Share Your Opinion

Too Much

I actually resent the fact that I'm expected to go to this event. I think it's a kind gesture from friends of my mother-in-law, but for heaven's sake, PLEASE leave me out. I'm exhausted at 36 weeks, and the last thing I want to do is be around a house full of ladies I have never met, smile, act like I feel good, and pretend we need yet more clutter.
—Guest tiredmomtobe


I think this is a moment in a new mom's life, and she should be celebrated. Not Grandma ... I mean, come on people, she had her moment. Baby showers are for moms ONLY!
—Guest Sio

Tread Lightly

Reading the comments here echo comments I've read in Mom forums. While it seems like a good idea for grandmas, who haven't had diapers in the house in years, it risks making the mom-to-be think she's not the center of attention, which she needs to be to focus on her health. Probably needs a conversation with her, inviting only Grandma's friends -- no overlap, and only the few things she needs to tide her over when babysitting.
—Guest Carol

I Think It's Cool

I thought about doing this since the parents-to-be are out of state and could not be the guest where I am. It would be like a stunt-mom job.
—Guest pkachu


I'm giving a grandmother shower for a friend who gave me one. Such a great idea. I have a stroller that's almost worn out because there have been three grandchildren growing up in it. Also, a booster seat, books, etc. Such a fun evening too because we were all about the same age, so it was pertinent ... and appreciated.
—Guest Danitza

Great Way to Make the Mom-to-Be Hate You

These stupid showers are a great way to make the new mom hate you, ecspecially if you are the mother-in-law. No one should be getting a shower for a child that they are not growing and pushing out of their bodies. Only the mom-to-be has the right to have a shower to celebrate the new life that SHE is building. No one else is entitled to that. Have one of these and expect to not see your grandchild very often. The baby is not the grandparents' and this just gives me the creeps, like the grandma is staking some kind of weird ownership over the baby. --Expectant Mother
—Guest Cynthia

Tackiest Thing I've Ever Heard Of

Are you serious? This is the worst, tackiest thing I have ever heard of. Only absolutely insane, baby-hogging MILs and moms would do this to their daughter-in-law or daughter. YUCK.
—Guest Katie


This comes across as inappropriate and annoying to most parents-to-be, judging by feedback I have seen on the topic on various parenting message boards. I have seen many instances where the grandmother makes the birth all about her rather than being about the new parents. Not saying this would always be the case, but it seems to happen often, resulting in family strife. Unless the grandmother is providing day care, there is no need for her to stock up on diapers or baby gear.
—Guest MomToBe


I think it's tacky, especially if the grandmother is not a first-time grandmother and the child will not be at her house for long durations. It is taking the excitement away from the first-time mom who is expecting.
—Guest Expectant Mother

This is a Great Idea!

I would have loved to receive a grandma shower when my first grandbabe was due. My daughter would have been the first to throw one for me too! I am going to start a new tradition among my friends by throwing them a Grandma Shower when they are expecting a new grandbaby! Holly www.HmmmHolly@blogspot.com

Another Approach

I would not take the focus off the mother-to-be. She needs a lot of support, and a shower is not only a practical way to help supply needed items for the baby, but it is a reassurance that there is support there. Grandma should be helping give the shower, especially if she's in contact with the mom-to-be's circle of friends. We, hopefully, had our turn. But if the grandmother will be watching the baby, maybe she could put the word out that she'll need some equipment, toys, and/or books.
—Guest JanB74


Interesting. I'm the grandmother of a 13-, 11- and 8-year-old, and I've never even heard of such a thing. It might be a fun gathering if kept low key, but my focus was on ensuring that pregnancy, birth and new motherhood was the big event for my daughter it is meant to be. I needed very little even though I was full time Gramma Daycare. We don't use cribs, playyards, etc. All I needed was a good stash of cloth diapers, a good changing table and a really good sling/wrap since I grandparented the same way I parented -- very attached.

It's a Wonderful Idea!

A few friends and relatives giving gifts to the grandmother to help with the first grandbaby and celebrate that wonderful time in life is perfect!
—Guest Libby

Combine with Mom

I think that it makes better sense to make grandma a big part of the mommy shower and on the registry for mom, you can include things that maybe grandma will need to help out with baby.
—Guest Maureen

The Spotlight?

Having become a grandmother for the first time, and 3 more times, in the last year and a half, I think this does sound like a fun idea; however I wouldn't want one. . . While I was so excited to become a grandmother, the spotlight belongs on the parents-to-be, not me. Perhaps I feel this way mostly because anyone who would be invited to a grandmother shower would be on the guest list for the baby shower.

Great Idea!

I love the idea. If the grandmother will be watching the baby regularly, she'll need a lot of equipment. Even if she just sees the baby for visits, it would be great to have books and toys on hand to share.
—Guest Liz Kennedy

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What Is Your Opinion of Grandmother Showers?

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