Kids and pets both bring great joy to the lives of many, but conflicts can arise from the combination of grandchildren, their pets and your pets. Although occasionally a pet problem may involve an iguana or parrot, most center around dogs and cats. Here are some of the dog problems and cat problems that can occur and some hints about how to handle them.
Problem: You have pets that aren’t accustomed to children.
My father’s cat disappears when my grandchildren appear on the scene and doesn’t resurface until they are gone. Some pets are not that accommodating. Many pets will gradually become accustomed to the grandchildren. Others never will, especially if your grandchildren live out of town and are infrequent visitors. Sometimes grandparents have elderly pets that don’t see well or that have other disabilities that prevent them from adjusting to new people.
Solution: Do whatever you need to do to keep your grandchildren safe.
Animal bites can be serious, and even scratches are cause for concern. If you are convinced that your grandchildren and your pet will not get along, you can put your animal into a secure room for the duration of the visit. You may even want to board your pet.
Problem: You don't really want pets as houseguests.
Your kids and grandkids are planning to visit and bring their pets. The grandchildren are welcome, but the grand-pets are not.
Solution. The best course of action depends upon your reason for not wanting the pets.
If you do not feel safe around the animals or if they destroy your property, you are justified in asking your family to board them instead of bringing them to visit. If boarding isn't a suitable solution, many areas have pet sitting services that may be more workable. If you simply don’t care for your grandchildren’s pets, you should probably grin and bear it. The saying, “Love me, love my dog,” reflects the feelings of many pet owners. If you can’t love your grand-pets, at least try to cultivate a liking for them.
Problem: A member of the family has an allergy to a pet.
Perhaps a grandchild has allergies that are aggravated by your pet, or perhaps you have an allergy to their pets. Either circumstance can be cause for concern.
Solution: There is no real solution for pet allergies, but there are measures that will help.
A person who is allergic to his or her own pet can sometimes take allergy shots, but that measure would hardly be justified for a pet that one sees only occasionally. A thorough cleaning of the house before the allergic person visits will help. One bedroom can be kept shut so that the pet does not have access to it. The pet should also be bathed before the visit. The allergic person should be sure to have the proper medication. If the allergy produces asthma, which can be more serious than other allergies, none of these measures may offer sufficient security against an attack. Visits may have to take place somewhere other than the home.
Problem: Your family members are overly fond of their pets.
They buy clothes for their pets, or pay hefty sums to ensure the lives and health of their pets.
Solution: Mind your own business.
As long as your grandchildren are not endangered by the presence of a dangerous pet, how your family members feel about their pets and how they indulge them is no business of yours. In fact, given the depth of affection many feel for their pets, a major rift in the family could occur if you question the feelings or behavior of family members where pets are concerned.
Problem: You are the one besotted.
Your family doesn't understand the depth of your feeling for your pet; in fact, you're not sure you understand it yourself.
Solution: Acceptance, not understanding, is the key.
If you have a pet that brings companionship and joy into your life, accept that for the gift that it is. Don't let others spoil your enjoyment of your pet. Pets can be especially important to elderly people, especially to those who have lost a spouse. Whatever your age or marital status, you are not alone in feeling that your pet is a vital part of your life. Pets are so important to so many people that they are often mentioned in obituaries. Sometimes they even appear in wedding announcements or receive bequests in their owner's wills. If you are crazy about your pet, you have a lot of company, and it is good company.
